Date: April 30, 2008 3:33 pm (Chapter 2)
This story so far is pretty good, in my opinion any way. I like how you've presented the characters, how you've built the story, and the little tid bit at the end stating that you'll be switching to another character.
Um, also, I read your two character bio's fully by the way, I noticed something interesting, The first one doesn't know the father and the second one doesn't know the mother, wouldn't it be sort of interesting if the first and second were related. I mean, according to their bio's, they both hate each other, so, in turn, it'd be a cruel twist of fate, if they were both related to each other. Just a small suggestion from one author to another.
Any who, Again, I like your story, and I'm looking forward to the next chapter you put up. Well.....What Happens Next!!! SO SAYS THE LORD OF LONG REVIEWS! Believe It! MEEP!!!
Author's Response: Heh, nice review. I tried to make it lean toward a more friendly method of storytelling, letting you get right into Adelas head, and not making you have to sit through her telling-offs, because she does get told off a lot :3 And you're quite right, Adela never knew her father, Kitini never knew her mother. Seems like something is amiss, does it not? :DrnrnThank you for your review, much appreciated to know someone's reading. I'm part way through the next chapter, so I hope you enjoy it :)